Self-Help Stop

Human life consists of four aspects: the spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical levels of existence. In order to find balance, wholeness, and fulfillment in our lives, we need to heal, develop, and integrate all four of these aspects within ourselves. Shakti Gawain

In today’s busy world, there are many demands on our time and drains on our energy. Often we are too exhausted to take care of our own needs or even to set boundaries. Taking care of ourselves on physical, mental/emotional, spiritual, and social levels is critical for living a happy and meaningful life. Even so, self-care is a struggle that many of us share. More than 50 million Americans suffer from one form of mental illness or another, and it is estimated that half of the population will develop at least one mental disorder and it can develop at any age. Following are some steps to take toward creating a life that will help you on all levels.

Maintain good health

There has been a lot of advertising around how to be healthy. All of us have a pretty good idea that the following are key to a healthy and long life:

• eating lots of fruits and veggies
• avoiding foods high in fat and sugar
• drinking lots of water
• exercising regularly
• sleeping at least 7 ½ hours each night
• trying new things

But like many things in life, knowing and executing are two totally different things. This is where knowing yourself, discipline, good habits, and patience will greatly help. Remember that exploration can be fun and not necessarily tedious.

Journal writing

Writing in a journal has been proven to provide many benefits. One practice that I recommend is to just write out whatever is in your head every morning. This will clear your mind to focus on the day. For those of you who like writing prompts:

• How are you feeling today?
• What is on the schedule for today?
• How are you feeling about the day ahead?
• What might get in the way of your tasks and what can you do about that?
• What are you most hopeful for in this moment?

You can do this first thing in the morning or as soon as convenient. This practice is similar to Julia Cameron’s “morning pages”. The idea is to give yourself a clean slate, free from all the random thoughts that seem to occupy too much of our brain and that drives how we feel. Journaling daily will help cultivate discipline, equanimity, and patience as well as reap more beneficial rewards over time with increased focus and serenity.

Meditate

Meditation is very relaxing and soothing. It’s a great practice that can clear your mind anytime you need to slow down, loosen up, or refocus on the present moment. Just 5 minutes will do wonders. A daily meditation practice offers many benefits such as

• enhanced willpower, well-being and creativity
• improved sleep and immune function
• increased focus and serotonin levels
• reduced stress and anxiety

According to Harvard Medical School, meditating 10 – 20 minutes a day can lower blood pressure. But don’t try to do too much if this is new for you. Attempt 1 to 5 minutes at first. Here is a simple exercise:

• Close your eyes and focus on your breathing. TIP: If thoughts are intruding, you can say in your head, “breath in” and “breath out” with each inhalation and exhalation while you focus on the rising and falling of your chest.
• Take 3 slow, deep breaths, letting each out slowly and then let your breathing return to its normal rhythm.
• Continue to focus on your breathing, in and out. Notice how breathing feels. Notice how your body feels. Don’t judge what you observe. It is just information. TIP: If thoughts or judgements come up, in your head say something like “thinking” or “those are just thoughts.” Let them go and return your focus to your breathing.

Be patient with yourself. It takes time to learn to maintain focus on breathing and let thoughts come and go without diverting our attention. It’s a practice, and practice makes improvement.

Walk in nature

Walking outside is like meditating if you focus on what you are seeing and experiencing in the moment. Walking helps one part of my brain focus on organizing my thoughts while another part notices the warmth of the sun, the scent of flowers, the buzzing of bees, and the pleasure of movement. It fosters feelings of serenity and well-being. If you have a dog, bring them along. Be present with your pet and look at the beauty around you. Notice the air you are breathing. Is it cold or warm? Look at the colorful flowers and variety of plantings. Can you smell freshly mown grass? What shade of blue is the sky? Is it cloudy or does sunshine brighten everything? How loud are the birds? Practicing awareness will help you stay in the moment and improve your focus. Engaging with the present rather than ruminating on our thoughts will be very refreshing!

Spend time with loved ones

Life is about relationships. Loving and being loved is a foundational necessity. Spending time with people who are good to us, who accept us the way we are, is more important than anything else. I would not be here today, or be the person I am, without the love and kindness of good people. When you find special people, hold on to them. They make good times better and difficult times a little easier.

Read

Reading is fuel for your mind. Exposing yourself to new ideas creates connections between known and new information, firing your imagination. This is true of both fiction and non-fiction. You can learn a lot about yourself, other people, and creating happiness in a book. Reading is also very relaxing. It’s good for you!

The Bottom Line

The suggestions offered here are things that have worked well for me. If they don’t work for you, find practices that make you happy and more open to all that life (and people) has to offer. Have fun exploring and trying new things. Fostering health and vitality, developing discipline, experimenting with new practices, and establishing and maintaining a balanced life gets easier with time. You are worth it!

What are your go-to self-care techniques? Feel free to comment below.